My Theory

"Forget what you heard, recognize what you see. I know you heard the rumors...now here's the real me." XoXo

Saturday, February 28, 2009

What We Wish They Knew


Wouldn’t the world be a better place if men knew…….

The don’t have to impress us, if we like them all they have to do is be themselves, treat us right and that will make us glow like a morning star.

Wouldn’t the world be a better place if men knew…….

All women really want is love, attention and a feeling of security.

Wouldn’t the world be a better place if men knew…….

Women really don't want to play games but sometimes games are the only known defense mechanism that will get the male species to act right.

Wouldn’t the world be a better place if men knew…….

No woman wants to be a booty call or a jump off ever!

Wouldn’t the world be a better place if men knew…….

Women never want to pressure a man to move to the next step but men often get comfortable and begin to drag their feet which makes women begin to inadvertently pressure them.

It is unfortunate how convoluted the lines of communication are between men and woman. Ladies, lets roll up our sleeves and at least try to help men understand us. If you have a significant other let your man know in the most simplest way, 1 thing that he does which really makes you happy. Then, tell him one thing you wish he knew.

Remember…..if we never tell them we cannot blame them.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Dedication to Z

For those of you who know me personally, you know that I am a dog lover by nature. On Friday, February 20, 2009, my dog of 11 years passed away. If you have never had a pet before you cannot begin to imagine the insurmountable feeling of loss that over takes you when you have lost your pet, which at some point became your buddy. Z, was 77 years old and in her time she had such an impact on myself and my family. At times I kept my distance from her but I always cared about her well being. I remember the day my brother fed Z Ramen noodles and she became very sick. She looked as if she she wouldn't make it and I swore that if she did not I would make my brother pay for his childish and ridiculous prank. Fortunately, she recovered and was fine, but that moment defined just how much she meant to me.

It is amazing how animals can take a human place in ones heart. Dogs especially have the unique ability to take on interesting personalities which give them character and makes you grow to love them. To some a pet becomes your friend, your companion or maybe just your responsibility. To me, Z was my buddy. I never had to say much to her, but her puppy dog eyes followed and watched everything I did.

I will miss her always.

RIP Z

Diva Do’s and Diva Don’ts



First let me start by saying when I use the word diva I use it in the context of a female who is taking care of business and trying to be successful in all areas of her life while looking good too. In no way am I referring to the over the top cell phone throwing, tantrum having, gold digging, hoodrat looking female, nor am I referring to the Diva, defined by Beyonce as a hustler. I am simply referring to a classy independent woman doing big things in a big way while still being able to be cute at all times. If that brief description describes you then welcome to our sister circle. If the description doesn’t describe you, maybe you should consider making the necessary adjustments. If your uncertain which group you belong to read the do’s and don’t’s listed below and if your guilty of 3 or more don’ts you might want to change your life!
1. A diva never personifies the “Felicia” character and hates on the next chick just because your old flame has moved on and is dating someone new. True divas hate in private and quickly, quickly get over it.
2. A diva is never dressed flawlessly from head to toe with expensive clothes, nice shoes and hot car yet her home and children look a hot mess. A diva’s style is consistant in all aspects of her life. If you cannot afford this lifestyle then take baby steps. I drove a hoopty for a time but rest assured with each penny I made I prioritized my apartment to be a place I could call home, then I upgraded from the hoopty.
3. A diva never chooses between making an expensive purchase vs. paying her bills. Diva’s live by affordable means and we pay our bills first and shop later.
4. A diva has a savings account that will hold her over for at least 1 year should she come upon troublesome times. I personally will continue to work on this one. No more needs to be said.
5. A diva is never caught cursing absurdly in an unseemly matter or acting raunchy in public. A diva is always a lady in public and her freaky side is only seen in private.
6. A diva is up to date on the events going on in the world and she can have an intelligent conversation with everyone from Hakeem the round the way player to Paul Wiess the corporate honcho.
7. This one is especially important! A diva is not a gold digger. I repeat a diva is not a gold digger. She is independent and has her own money. She does not exchange her body and time for money, she does not date drug dealers, and she does not trap men with pregnancies. A diva depends on NO man, she’ll work 2 jobs and do overtime before selling out.
8. A diva does not tolerate domestic violence just to be with a man. Ladies you cannot be a diva by day and getting smacked down at night. It doesn’t work that way. No man has the right to inflict pain on you by means of physical, emotional or verbal abuse. If this pertains to you I strongly urge you to call the National Domestic Violence hotline at 800-799-7233 or visit the website at http://www.ndvh.org/. Stand up don’t get shaken down!
9. A diva is never caught in public with unshaved legs or unshaved armpits. If you wear a skirt shave or wax those legs please! I personally believe that underam hair is never acceptable ANY time of the year but if you disagree at least shave your underarms in the summer…please.
10. Last but not least….a diva has good credit and if not she is taking the necessary steps to correct it. You cannot be independent if you always need a co-signer. Mistakes happen I agree, but be knowledgeable of your credit rating and if your credit is flawed its better to work on it rather than just ignore it.

There you have it folks my diva do’s and don’t for this month. Tally up your score to see where your stand.
Guilty of 0 don’ts – High five to you, you’re a true diva!!!
Guilty of 1-3 don’ts- You’ve obtained diva status because your working on improving your life everyday
Guilty of 4-6 don’ts- I hope this is an eye opener for you and you use this as motivation to make a positive change.
Guily of 5-6 don’ts- Think you should grow up and be responsible first and worry about being a diva later.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Diary Runs

Dear Diary, 02-04-09

Today was my day off from the gym. I would be lying if I said I wasn't ecstatic that I did't have to run today. Yesterday I ran 2.25 miles in 26.01 minutes. I know I defiantly have to speed it up, but right now I am focusing on not dying in the middle of my run. I believe I said I wanted to run the challenge "effortlessly and gracefully," well the challenge is in 80 days and I will need all 80 of them to master that. Surprisingly, despite how much my legs hurts I am still really encouraged and I know that I can pull this off.

My workout last night included about 40 minutes of cardio and 15 minutes of weights. In the research that I did today, my findings show that I need to increase the I time I spend with weights so I can build muscle mass. I will try to implement 20-25 minutes of weights tomorrow. With one day of rest, I hope to turn my usual out of breath grimace into an actual smile.

Wish me luck*

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

The Countdown Begins

Join me in my fight against time as I train for the Lincoln Tunnel Challenge on April 26, 2008 @ 8:45am


http://lincolntunnelchallenge.sonj.org/

My first 5K Race!!!

On April 26, 2009 I will be participating in the Lincoln Tunnel Challenge 5k race sponsored by AmeriHealth. The proceeds will go to the Special Olympics of New Jersey. The race will start in New Jersey to New York City and back via the Lincoln Tunnel. This will be my first 5k and I am both excited and nervous. While the race is optional to run/walk my intentions is to run the whole way through. Running from NJ to NY is an amazing story to tell and running under water through a tunnel makes the story even better!

If you are wondering what stemmed this desire I'll tell you. In September of 2008, I decided to get serious and I began to really dedicate my time to becoming fit conscious. I implemented running into my workout plan and I have been running ever sense. The day I ran my first mile I knew running was something I wanted to continue and I immediately pledged to run a 5k. Fast forward to February 2009, I have since found a race to participate in and I am ready to fulfill my pledge.

To keep track of my progress I will post regular diary entries so I can stay on course. I have created my own personal training strategy that will be successful in helping me complete the race. This week I am up to 2.25 miles. While 2.25 miles is still quite difficult to achieve I am convinced that in 8 weeks I will be able to run the 5k gracefully and effortlessly.

Runners who can complete the race in 25 minutes will start at 8:45am. Runners who will need more than 25 minutes will start at 9:15. For those who know me well, you know that I will be striving to start at 8:45.

I encourage you to take to this journey with me as I strive to complete my first 5K. Any tips or words of motivation are strongly welcomed. If over the course of time my diary reflects that I have been slacking, I challenge you to be a true friend and call me on it.

Setting goals and carrying them out is what 2009 is all about. I have many goals to fulfill but I am well on the way. I hope you look forward to the diary entries that are soon to come, I'll see you at the finish line!!!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Towel Dry vs. Blow Dry

My usual routine after a long day at work includes me going to the gym to work off some stress. Now I admit on this particular day I was a little agitated and short tempered by some of the events in my day but what I am about to tell you more than agitated me. I walked into the ladies locker room and I began changing into my gym clothes preparing for the 2 mile run I had to accomplish. Although its was about 8:30pm and the evening rush should have subsided the ladies locker room was packed. Woman were everywhere scattered about relishing in the comfort provided by this upscale gym. Now I know you are all curious as to which gym I am referencing however, you know what they say about curiosity.

Nonetheless, as I began to lace up my cute pink Airmaxx sneakers less than 3 feet away from me stood a middle aged woman drying her pubic region with one of the public blow dryers. Now, this luxurious woman's locker room that I speak of is in no way small. There is a vast amount of space and ample privacy should one need it. Towels, great lighting, numerous mirrors and accessible blow dryers are just a few of the basic locker room amenities provided by the gym.

My issue is that pubic drying is something that should not be done in public for everyone to see. This anomaly did not occur in the back of the locker room or in a space thought to be private. This act occurred directly in front of me, in a space that was prone to heavy traffic and is typically highly populated. I wasn't the only one startled by this, several bystanders appeared quite dismayed as well. Pubic drying is on the same list with towel flossing, it is an act that should only be done in private, and not with the same blow dryer or towel I am going to use in the next 50 minutes!

I am curious to hear your thoughts. Is public pubic blow drying proper gym etiquette?